What Would You Do?

Oftentimes we, as humans, make things more complicated than they should be.  I’m the master at this.  My tendency to examine and ponder about various aspects of my internal goings-on can be called tedious, at best.  Allowing simplicity to pour over each situation would definitely save me a lot of tossing and turning emotionally.  However, handing over that trust to God is exactly what our faith walk is.  For me, it is something that I have to do on a daily basis, multiple times a day.  It’s so easy to put my fingerprints all over everything in my life.  Part of that is being a mother or a woman, I think.  Another part is because of the old battle scars.  I’m happy that I have them, because the situations I went through made me a stronger person.  However, I have no wish to revisit the pain that accompanied them.

So with all of this touching, messing with, and overthinking, sometimes I have to force myself to stop and ask myself the following question:

What would I do if I knew that God’s hand would provide the means to accomplish it?

The answer is so simple, but the acting out of this answer is what is difficult.  Fear really gets in the way.  Fear and its accompanying “what if’s” too often keep me from stepping out with confidence.  On the other side of that, I’m impatient and once solid in a direction, I get where I want to get the ball rolling sooner than I need to.


How about you?  What would you do if you knew that God would provide the means to accomplish that which your heart desires to do?  Do you let fear sidetrack you?  Or impatience push you before the right time?

Never Thought I’d Be Here Again…

I never thought I'd be in a place where I'd rather be in a spirit-filled worship service with a congregation of fellow believers. I never thought that I'd desire to sing worship music again as a part of my calling… at least I didn't think I would until I died and was doing it for eternity in heaven. I never thought that I'd be right HERE, in a hotel room in the middle of nowhere after having sang at a gig some music that touched people. All I want to do is worship Him, but part of me doesn't know how anymore.

I don't mean that I haven't praised Him with my lips in prayer all these years, because I have. I've never cursed Him even in our greatest storms, and there have been some hurricanes. I've asked Him "why?" plenty of times hasn't He vindicated us, but I ultimately just focus on how He has protected us and thanked Him for it.

I've worshipped Him in private. I've sang a few worship songs and hymns on-line by myself and with my girls. We have sat on our front porch or at our dining table and sang hymns. But corporate worship has been something I have been stand-offish about.

I'm not into hype. I am not a fan of churches having a light show and an expensive sound system. I'm not saying God can't be there in the middle of that, but it tends to make me cringe a bit.

However, I can't wait until I am in a service where all believers are joined together in genuine love for God. I can't wait for that purity of worship that comes when fears are cast aside and trust is embraced. I feel it is close. I can't wait. I also never thought I'd be here again.

Spiritual Dream from 2007

Written in my journal on 12/14/2007.:

I just woke up in the middle of the night after a dream…


There was a news telecast with a woman reporter.  She was doing a story on an important world-wide event.

Three soldiers were taking three plants to this underground cave where it was dry and arid.  Their mission was to plant the plants, get out of there, and let them grow for a few years.  I remember thinking that it seemed like a foolish thing to do and a dangerous thing to leave something you know nothing about to grow in a dark place– as you never know what kind of mutating will happen.

As the three men were coming out and heading to their separate vehicles, the TV journalist told them that they had better hurry up and get out of there because of a risk of a nuclear blast.  You could see the panic in their faces.  They tried to get away in a Monopoly box with wheels, but the tires just spun in place.  One guy’s face in particular looked remorseful and scared before he was overtaken, (by the blast.)  (Insertion: The HUM-V’S turned into Monopoly boxes, and the Monopoly man on the box turned into a leader of our country.  I had no idea that this person would go from business man to our leader.)

During this time there was a congregation of people in this desert area.  They started to say that it didn’t feel like a local, “normal” nuclear blast.  They started murmuring amongst themselves that it was a world-wide blast.

I saw hundreds and hundreds of people lying on the ground “asleep” in various positions.  (A family member of mine) was laying there. Surrounding these bodies were hundreds of people standing. They were moving nervously– twittering about the blast.  Some were worried.  Others were not.

Suddenly some of them turned around with joy on their faces looking to the sky.  I heard a note and looked to the heavens.  Jesus was standing on a cloud.  I began to be raptured along with some of the other people.  I looked to where (family member) had been lying.  He was gone and I knew that he had gone up.  Some of the people that had been asleep on the ground, including a couple who I had considered godly and were pastors, remained asleep.  I remember being shocked at that in the dream.


Thoughts in 2017:

I am just relaying my dream.  I have no interpretation, except for the obvious.  I have held onto this dream for nearly 10 years.  However, in light of current events, I felt that it was time to.  I know without a doubt that this dream is from God. I will seem like a lunatic to some people, but I’d rather deal with those repercussions than be disobedient to God.

God help us and guide us.

written by Erisa